Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the black person.

If you're a racist, and you want to get away with saying racist stuff all the time...become a comedian. That way you can belittle pretty much every race and no one would say anything to you! Only way you could mess this up is if you were having a bad day and some black men happened to start heckling you and you somehow lost all control and called them niggers. But come on. What are the chances of that happening? So all you descendants of Italians, French, Grecians, Jewish…what’s a word I could use to catch all these groups…hmmm. White. That’ll do it. All you white people out there: listen up!

If you, in light of this recently imparted knowledge, now aspire to be a racist comedian but fear not being funny, don’t worry. If you tell bad jokes, a few people will laugh. Because chances are there will be a few racists in the room and as long as you’re degrading a group of oppressed people or a minority (I know what you’re thinking…oppressed and minority don’t mean the same thing? Surprised me too.) they will laugh.

Yes, I know you watched the Kramer video and it didn’t seem like anyone was laughing. It probably was. You just can’t make it out. But for fun let’s assume no one was laughing. Either they were smart enough to hold it in until they got in the parking lot then talked about it the whole way home. Or the audience was comprised of minorities (I didn’t even know black people watched Seinfield. Guess you gotta watch something when your cable gets cut off.) and white liberals. How many white conservatives go to comedy clubs? Their idea of comedy is “Let’s give crack to black people and see what happens.”

I enjoy comedians that make jokes about different groups, even when they are based on race or ethnicity. I don’t think there is anything wrong with it or that all or even most comedians are racist. All I’m saying is if you’re going to be a racist, you might as well get paid for it.